Monday, September 22, 2008

Help, my toddlers out of control

There isn't just one right way to get children to behave themselves. There is no magic wand that can be waved and out pops the perfect child, how you disipline your child will depend on your child's temperament, you and your partners parenting style and the situation you find yourselves in will all influence the methods you use, eg a very quiet, timid child may need only gentle guidance where as a more defiant, stubborn child who hates being controlled will probably be more of a challenge, and if you have a similar nature it could be a recipe for fire works.
Avoid yelling, hitting or getting too worked up during episodes when your child misbehaves. This just increases the negative attention that your child receives and reinforces that it is alright to get out of control and be aggressive. Try to remain calm while administering punishment. You should walk away if you feel that you may loose you temper or physically hurt your child. It is very important to use positive dicipline and encourage good behavouir through praise, it helps to teach by example. Children learn a lot about how to behave and cope with situations by copying adults, and that usually means you and your partner. It is better to child-proof your home, put valuable, breakable and dangerous objects out of your child's reach this helps to avoid arguments when accedints happen. Where you can and where it is not sending out the wrong messages try to see the funny side of your child's behaviour, a sense of humour is essential when dealing with the challenges of parenting. When you or your partner feel under pressure or there are a lot of other stresses in your life, it can seem harder to cope with a demanding child. It is important to take sometime for yourself and work at ways of keeping stress to a minimum, keep reminding yourself that your child is learning your behavouir and will pick up very quickly that there is a problem so try to keep adult stresses and worrys out of their lives as much as you can, not always easy but defenatly worth trying.